Nummies 911

Yoga Retreat Fall 2011

I returned this week from the Fall Yoga Retreat with Lisa Lofthouse of Breathing Space in Fayetteville, North Carolina. 

The following is a poem that was read one afternoon.

Self-Observation Without Judgment

Release the harsh and pointed inner
voice. It's just a throwback to the past,
and holds no truth about this moment.

Let go of self-judgment, the old,
learned ways of beating yourself up
for each imagined inadequacy.

Allow the dialogue within the mind
to grow friendlier, and quiet. Shift
out of inner criticism and life
suddenly looks very different.

I can say this only because I make
the choice a hundred times a day
to release the voice that refuses to
acknowledge the real me.

What's needed here isn't more
prodding toward perfection, but
intimacy - seeing clearly, and
embracing what I see.

Love, not judgment, sows the
seeds of tranquility and change.

by Danna Faulds
from the book One Soul: More Poems From the Heart of Yoga 

Party Hats & Party Girls : Act 8

This is Heidi. Don't let her name fool you, this child is brilliant, decisive, outspoken, a leader and sometimes just a trial of her mother's nerves. I love her, though. I appreciate the outspoken honesty and unlimited curiosity which combined with her lack of patience often get her in trouble from simple disobeying to climbing up to a zip line and lacking the ability to dismount she does what any Heidi would do, she let's it rip. She was wearing a helmet I recall. So you can see where I get my drift.

Anyway, after my surgery, I spent two weeks recovering at my sisters and Heidi saw a party hat I knitted. She asked for one right away, you know the way kids ask for a candy bar or an icee, never thinking of the money and time that goes into buying those things or knitting a hat. Their lack of currency knowledge is refreshing to me. So, of course I knitted her a party hat and while she was slow to warm up, she was quite the model toward the end. She was very proud of it, which warmed my heart and she insisting on wearing it every where she went in the 100 plus degree weather of South Mississippi in August.

I've got lots of yarn left over, so if you want a party hat for a special little (or big one) just let me know. I'm going to put a few on etsy, but I love taking special orders from those I know.

Thanks Heidi for making me laugh, and from one short gut to another, we gals gotta stick together.

Love you,
Aunt Becki

 

      

 

Where Have I Been???

Well, it was a crazy summer with all the kiddos together.  It was great   fun, until, on the last event, a trip to Myrtle Beach, I got very sick. It wasn't until we were on our way home, that I decided the pain was severe enough to stop at an ER. We stopped at McCleod Memorial in Florence, SC.

After admission, they found my abdomen (below my diaphragm) was full of air, meaning that there was a break somewhere in my digestive system. I was sent for a CT scan and scheduled for surgery, only to find out that the CT scan showed no obvious breaks.  The contrast didn't leak out anywhere.  Thank goodness I had the best surgeon I've ever met since my gastric bypass surgeon. He was patient enough to wait and every day something weird would happen, I'd spike a temp, or drop 3 points in my hemoglobin, things like that. Still he wanted to wait, and so did I. We kept waiting until finally after five days a barium swallow showed no leakages. I was allowed to eat and once I did fine with that, I was released.  It has been assumed that most probable cause was an ulcer in my post gastric surgery stomach that was probably thinning the lining and finally allowed a break during an episode of throwing up (which I did just previous to going to the ER.) Both the hospitalist and surgeon have told me my likely survival would have been dim had I not gotten to the hospital when I did.

Now you guys know I'm a nurse and my sister is a Medical Tech, and we don't make the best of patients.  But these guys, the staff at McCleod were absolutely the best I've ever seen.  At one point I was taking morphine every two hours and even on a busy day, at shift change or the middle of the night, I NEVER had to wait. The doctors worked together and never entered the room empty handed when it came to test results and plans for action. The nurses and docs never balked at our questions or suggestions and if they disagreed, they politely explained why and we understood their reasoning. The surgeon even went so far as to contact my gastric bypass doctor in North Carolina. On my day of discharge, I leisurely ate my small breakfast and we joked that maybe we would be out of there by noon or 1pm, knowing how busy things are.  I was released about 10am and that was mainly because WE were not ready. So all and all, if you have to get sick on the road, Florence, South Carolina is a very good place to do it. Their customer service rivals that of Disney. I even got a follow up call from the nursing staff a few days after my discharge. Not the doctor, but the head of nursing staff for the floor on which I stayed.  She said, "Call us anytime if we can help or answer a question for you.  We hope you are feeling well." 

Thank you McCleod, for some of the finest medical care I could ask for. Thank you Lisa and Dean for coming to sit with me when it was still early and I didn't have a clue what was going on. Thank you for taking my three children to Fayetteville. Thank you Liz and Kevin for taking care of Camille while I was in the hospital despite the challenges you had going on that week. Thank you Stacy and Amanda for driving way to far just to be with me in the hospital and making me laugh when I had abdominal pain (thank goodness for the morphine.) Thank you for driving me to pick up Camille and driving me home.  And lastly thank you Anna, for believing me when I said I needed help and for taking care of everything else that needed attention while I was away. And for everyone else who kept in touch via text and calls, thank you for your concerns, thoughts, and prayers. 

I'm still recovering and you know my impatient self is frustrated with that. But it will come, it will. I just need to believe and spend this time healing. I need to learn to accept the help, and it has come in so many forms, from so many people that I'm sure I would leave someone out if I tried to name them all, but you know who you are and believe me, I think of your kindness almost daily now. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

 

 

Spiritual Retreat...Check!

I'm here in the mountains of North Carolina at a Yoga Retreat hosted by my dearest friend Lisa Lofthouse. I've been here less than a day and already the experience has surpassed my expectations.
The place, Bend of Ivy Lodge, is beyond beautiful. The people are warm and inviting, and of course the instructor is fantastic. This morning's yoga opened up my soul...wide open! Tears flowed as the hurts of the past year let loose their hold and slipped away. What a relief! My heart is full of gratitude for everything and everyone who made this trip possible.
NAMASTE!